Quiting my job for my health was just the start

Quitting my job was the hardest decision I have made in a long time. My health was at an all time low. I couldn’t go more than a week without missing a day. I would get a virus and could hardly function for weeks at a time. The guilt I felt everytime I missed was eating me up inside.

I loved my job and everyone I worked with. I started there as a part time receptionist. I worked my way up throughout the 5 years I was there. I was really good at my job and had great frienships with everyone there. I found my best friend there.

They worked so hard to keep me there. There was a point system and I was always close to losing my job. I am forever grateful for how everyone helped me there.

When corona hit I took it as a sign. I get sick to easily it had me shook. I went on personal leave for a while, and stayed home with my girls. I have always dealt with anxeity and now it is sky high. I started to have full body panic attacks and ended up starting some medication to help me.

Finally I decided to put my notice in. I didn’t feel it was fair to everyone that I worked with to pick up my slack all the time from being sick constantly. I cried a lot over this decision. At this point I couldn’t hardly drive without panicking. There was no turning back once I hit the send button on my email.

Leaving my career was hard I worked my butt off to get to where I was. The anxeity and depression I was facing because of my health, just wasn’t bearable anymore. I knew I had to take my life into my own hands and change for the better.

At first it was so hard. I literally had to keeping moving all day to keep my anxeity at bay. If I sat more than 15 minutes I would feel the anxeity and depression creep in. After the first month I started to slowly improve.

A lot of that was thanks to the new medication I started. I don’t know why I waited so long. I have battled these emotions ever since I was a little kid. At first I didn’t realize what it was, I do think it took a long time to figure out why I struggled in life.

Once I realized it I was in so deep I didn’t know how to reach out for help. Everyone just knew how I was, knew how to tiptoe around me. I was embarrassed to say I need help I’m not okay.

This time it was affecting my ability to be 100% mommy to my kids. I knew I had to let everyone close to me what was happening. I needed people to help me. I changed my diet and started to exercise more. I started seeing my therapist again. Luckily all of this worked, my overall mood was so much better. I was able to play with my kids like I never have gotten to before. My relationship is better than it has ever been with my boyfriend.

I also have health issues that have been a major factor to my health. Those symptoms have almost completely gone away as well. It is crazy how long I didn’t live my life to it’s fullest. I had no ideal that my job was stressing me out this much.

I missed out on so much. I now feel like I wasn’t 100% present in my own life. My eyes are wide open now. Sometimes we need to take time to figure ourselves out. I am greatful for having the opportunity to be able to do this. I know I have a lot of work ahead of me to continue this path I’m on.

All the hard work is more than worth it. I am nervous to start working again. However, now I have a support system as well. People to call me out if I don’t seem like myself. I know now the signs to look out for myself. If my anxeity is getting worse. If I’m getting sick all the time.

People think anxiety is people curled up in a ball crying. Yes, sometimes it is. Other times it starts killing your immue system and your sick all the time. I went to so many doctors, had so many tests run. No one could tell me why I was sick so much.

Leaving my job changed my life forever. I would never want to go back and change my decision. Taking care of yourself is so important. If your feeling off just start a conversation. Get your feeling out and never give up on yourself. You are worth the effect. You are worth everything. There is help out there. There is light on the other side.

I was lucky to have a great job. I liked coming to work and I worked with grest people. I was there about 5 years and build grest relationships with everyone there.
The major problem there was me.
I always struggled with my mental and physical health. My co-workers unfortunately had to deal with this all the time. Towards the end of my time there I couldn’t go more than a week without missing a day.
The guilt of missing was unbearable for me. Everyone I worked with was always understanding

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